Without further ado, here is the comment that went along with this article which talked about the death of Christopher Lane and a proposed change in society:
Sex culture? Let's talk about rape culture.
Rape Culture Is…
1. A university in Canada that allows the following student orientation chant: “Y is for your sister. O is for oh-so-tight. U is for underage. N is for no consent. G is for grab that ass.”
2. Pop music that tells women “you know you want it” because of these “blurred lines” (of consent).
3. A judge who sentenced only 30 days in jail to a 50-year-old man who raped a 14-year-old girl (who later committed suicide), and defended that the girl was “older than her chronological age.”
4. Mothers who blame girls for posting sexy selfies and leading their sons into sin, instead of talking with their sons about their responsibility for their own sexual expression.
5. Photo memes like this:
(see article link below)
6. Supporting athletes who are charged with rape and calling their victims career-destroyers.
7. Companies that create decals of a woman bound and gagged in order to “promote their business.”
8. People who believe that girls “allow themselves to be raped.”
9. Journalists who substitute the word “sex” for “rape” – as if they’re the same thing.
10. Politicians distinguishing “legitimate rape” and stating that rape is “something that God intended to happen,” among other horrendous claims.
11. Calling college students who have the courage to report their rapes liars.
12. The ubiquity of street harassment – and how victims are told that they’re “overreacting” when they call it out.
13. Victims not being taken seriously when they report rapes to their university campuses.
14. Rape jokes – and people who defend them.
15. Sexual assault prevention education programs that focus on women being told to take measures to prevent rape instead of men being told not to rape.
16. The victimization of hospital patients, especially people with mental health issues and the elderly, by the very people who are there to protect them.
17. Reddit threads with titles like “You just have to make sure she’s dead” when linking to the story of a 13-year-old girl in Pakistan being raped and buried alive.
18. Reddit threads dedicated to men causing women pain during sex (I’m not going to give the thread credence by linking to it).
19. Twitter hashtags that support accused rapists and blame victims.
20. Publicly defending celebrities accused of rape just because they’re celebrities and ignoring or denouncing what the victim has to say.
21. Assuming that false reporting for sexual assault cases are the norm, when in reality, they’re only 2-8%, which is on par with grand theft auto.
22. Only 3% of rapists ever serving a day in jail.
23. Women feeling less safe walking the streets at night than men do.
24. 1-in-5 women and 1-in-71 men having reported experiencing rape.
25. The fact that we have to condition ourselves not to use violent language in our everyday conversations.
And the list could go on.
http://everydayfeminism.com/2014/03/examples-of-rape-culture/
EDUCATE YOURSELF
First of all, I want to thank you, anonymous commenter, for this comment and for taking the time to find this article. However, I do want to go ahead ask that if you do want to leave a comment, could you at the very least not copy and paste from another article? My readers and I know how to click on a link and I promise if you post one I'll be more than happy to follow it, no need to copy and paste.
But, since you did, I feel compelled to go ahead and respond to your comment as your own personal ideas rather than that of an outlying website. Thus, here we are with an entire article based on this subject.
I want to make one thing abundantly clear before I go any further. I do not, under any circumstances, condone rape. It is a vile crime and an even more horrendous experience for any victim involved. No one can accurately put into words what it can feel like and how much it can hamper a person later in life. Rapists are monsters, pure and simple.
Now, I have many points that I want to talk about but, since you brought this up, I feel it is only right to focus on your points first. Unfortunately, I don't have the time to go through each and every point you brought up, but I'll do my best with a handful of them.
First; "Sex culture? Let's talk about rape culture."
We live in a world full of humans, correct? And as humans in this modern world, we have many basic morals that we live by ie: murder is wrong, stealing is wrong, help the less fortunate, we don't have to kill someone because they have smallpox etc. On top of this list is a disdain for rape. Obviously not everyone feels the exact same way about these morals, which means we have serial killers and serial rapists. However, just because rape exists does not mean we live in a culture that actively calls for or justifies rape, to say that we do is beyond ignorant.
That brings me to your list of examples of Rape Culture.
2. Pop music that tells women “you know you want it” because of these “blurred lines” (of consent).
Ok, if you haven't heard the song, that's fine don't go rushing to YouTube to look it up. Personally, I don't find the song to be offensive at all, but I know plenty of people do, most likely due to the social media hype that was brought up last year/ the beginning of this year surrounding this song that people didn't even bother to read the actual lyrics. The comment actually infers "of consent" from the lyrics where there is actually little to no suggestion that this has anything to do with consent and more to do with the empowerment of women.
While to some the lyrics seem gross and the music video even worse, I'd just have to say that that is straight up bullshit. You want demeaning and gross? It's been happening for years across multiple genres of music (Smack That by Akon ft Eminem, Up All Night by Hinder, Something in Your Mouth by Nickelback, I Get Off by Halestorm, S&M by Rihanna, etc.).
The song Blurred Lines has nothing to do with rape and the fact that western feminists are pushing this (so much so that Thicke has canceled concerts) only goes to show the ignorance of the group and how little attention is paid to actual problems across the world (and here at home) such as the sex trade, girls in the Middle East being shot for going to school, etc.
4. Mothers who blame girls for posting sexy selfies and leading their sons into sin, instead of talking with their sons about their responsibility for their own sexual expression.
I was okay with the first link that literally said it was an "Everyday Feminism" site. I could handle that and give them the benefit of the doubt that maybe, possibly, they did unbiased, accurate research to get more than one example for each of these 25 examples.
Then it linked me to Jezebel. And I can't even begin to describe how much I wanted to claw my eyes out as I read the post concerning one (you read that right, one) mother who posted an article about how girls should refrain from posting revealing selfies online. Jezebel, as is the custom there, decided to infer that this mother never talked to her boys about sex or responsibility with no real proof.
6. Supporting athletes who are charged with rape and calling their victims career-destroyers.
Steubenville, am I right? I was right.
Nowhere, absolutely nowhere, in this article does anyone support what the boys did. However, if these boys were convicted of murder, theft, arson, animal cruelty or grand theft auto we would be focusing on how they are still young kids who made an absolutely horrid decision that cost them their future but because it was rape the stigma is even worse for these kids. Because of one night's decision these boys will go through early adulthood incarcerated and will come out as registered sex offenders. The crime is horrible, despicable, inhumane, and horrendous. The rapists were kids who chose to make the biggest mistake of their entire lives, committed a crime and completely ruined any shot they had at continuing a career as football players.
Once again, nowhere does anyone in the article say that the victim is a career destroyer. This is most likely taken from the Twitter uproar that surrounded this entire event that saw many people blaming many different things and people for what had happened. Many blamed the parents of each of the teenagers involved, some blamed the girl, some blamed the kid who videotaped it, some blamed the alcohol, but most blamed the boys who actively participated in this horrid atrocity.
There's a difference between feeling sorry for the kids who ruined their entire lives in one night, that's called empathy, and supporting what they actually did. I understand not everyone will ever be able to feel sorry for these boys and I'm not asking you to. All I'm asking is that you don't assume people are supporting the act when they are simply supporting two boys who ruined their own lives.
9. Journalists who substitute the word “sex” for “rape” – as if they're the same thing.
The journalist who wrote this did not substitute words. They said exactly what they were supposed to say. In the United States of America, no one is guilty of a crime until they have been proven guilty. As rape is an extremely serious allegation, journalists tend to stay away from headlines that involve "rape" unless there have been proven cases of a crime. In this case, if you didn't read the article, the word sex is used to describe intercourse that had not been determined to be consensual or not. This is the correct use of the word.
12. The ubiquity of street harassment – and how victims are told that they’re “overreacting” when they call it out.
No source is given for this information so I'll assume that this is just a general idea that you had. Now, I'm no fan of cat calling, nor do I know any decent human beings that participate in it, in fact I know no one who has ever participated in it, but, since I don't live under a rock, I know it happens. However, just as I would say to the "Ban Bossy" campaign or anyone who decides to tell people when they can and cannot say something, I'd like to direct your attention to the Bill of Rights and the First Amendment to the Constitution. This amendment protects freedom of speech with few restrictions placed upon it (you can't yell "FIRE!" in a movie theater). You may believe I am defending this act by saying people should be allowed to have their freedom of speech. However, I'm also of the belief that people have a right to common decency and that there is no actual reason for douchebags to be catcalling as they drive by.
If you wouldn't say it face to face with her, why does your upgraded Maserati give you permission to do it? Honestly it's a cowardly thing to do.
14. Rape jokes – and people who defend them.
First off, the page links to one douchebag who takes it too far, not very convincing of an entire culture. But I do agree that this guy's "joke" is despicable. Anyway, do you understand the psychology of jokes? Obviously not. People joke about things to lighten the mood. It's how jokes work. However, when it comes to rape jokes it's sometimes even deeper than that.
Victims of rape are expected to continue on in their life, especially if they never report it happened to them. This can create many different attitudes towards life and, much like soldiers who have seen brutal combat, sometimes their mind twists things to add a sick side of humor to their otherwise traumatic ordeal. So, don't go believing that every person out there is attempting to expand this supposed "culture" that supports rape. Some are just trying to get through their life.
15. Sexual assault prevention education programs that focus on women being told to take measures to prevent rape instead of men being told not to rape.
Do you understand how asinine of a statement this is? Sexual assault PREVENTION programs decide to teach women ways to PREVENT rape, how dare they!? It's like they are doing exactly what they are supposed to be doing. Rape is not a male v female thing. I am appalled that you would even suggest such a blatantly ignorant viewpoint. The fact that you seem to believe that rape is a singularly male-offender crime is no surprise, but is completely 100% false.
Also, how many courses do we have that teach people to not steal or to not murder or to not become some sort of criminal? Because last I checked we don't normally teach people not to do these things, it's a part of growing up in a modern-day society that people know not to do these things.
Finally, how many male focused sexual assault prevention courses are there in the States? I did some research and I can't find a single male-focused course while there are many women-only courses. In fact, when I looked at articles related to this issue, more prevalent than courses that pertain to tips to prevent rape for men, the articles discuss how men can stop themselves from raping someone or how their default setting is one of violence and therefore they need to be careful not to go off on someone else.
22. Only 3% of rapists ever serving a day in jail.
Here we might find some common ground. Now this is slightly misleading simply because it seems to say that 97% of rapists go through the justice system and walk free. This is far from the truth. If we go with the number of reported rapes (generally 46% of all rapes) the number rises to 12.5% of all reported rapists spend time in jail. If we go to the number of arrested suspects (12% of all rapes lead to an arrest), 25% of all suspected rapists spend time in jail.
Now, before I get you believing that I am trying to construe the horrible statistics here I just want to make it clear that I am simply providing my readers with more information and less misleading statistics.
Back to the common ground. I am a huge proponent of individual rights, as can be seen from many of my postings on here. However, I am also a -less vocal- advocate for a tougher stance on crime and a faster judicial process. This would raise the number of solved crimes while also raising the number of innocents facing jail time. That puts us at an impasse. Do we want to feel safer looking at the number of cases closed or do we want to feel safer knowing there is less of a chance (with the way the system is set up now) that we will be convicted of a crime we didn't commit?
I leave that to my readers and you to contemplate, just know that there is a tradeoff no matter what.
23. Women feeling less safe walking the streets at night than men do.
This phenomenon is actually completely baseless when compared to actual crime rates. I'm not a psychologist, nor do I play one on TV, so I won't try to explain why men and women feel safe when they do.
I can, however, suggest that men feel safer simply because we have an invincibility complex about us. We believe, wrongly, that we can handle any thug that wants to rob, kidnap, rape or murder us and thus have no real problem walking around at night.
Phew, that was a lot at once, wasn't it? Enough education for a little while?
Let's take a break.
Back already? Well then I guess it's time for me to go ahead and make my own point.
If, as you suggest, we do live in this "Rape Culture" (which was never actively explained but that's okay, I get it) then we have to ask ourselves where it comes from. What perpetuates such a desire to rob someone of their complete privacy and right to self? What causes people to go down such a heinous path as rape (arguably worse than murder)?
And here we wind up back at the original portion of the article that started this chain: sex culture. Just as I said in the first article, the sex culture that we live in, in which EVERYTHING is sexualized, is despicable. What really starts a culture of rape? The acceptance and perpetuation of sex in everything from sports to music to advertising to food to animals to each other. We live in a culture that has removed sex from the bedroom and thrown it haphazardly into every crevice of society.
Am I naive enough to believe that rape had not been around before the prevalence of this sex culture? No, nor am I of the belief that rape will suddenly disappear when this culture of sex has diminished. Rape is around because humans are around. It's a sad fact of life that we will most likely never fully eradicate. That does not mean we live in a culture that perpetuates, accepts, or agrees with rape. That's why it is a crime that many believe could be punishable by death and others believe should mean life in prison.
That brings me to your list of examples of Rape Culture.
2. Pop music that tells women “you know you want it” because of these “blurred lines” (of consent).
Ok, if you haven't heard the song, that's fine don't go rushing to YouTube to look it up. Personally, I don't find the song to be offensive at all, but I know plenty of people do, most likely due to the social media hype that was brought up last year/ the beginning of this year surrounding this song that people didn't even bother to read the actual lyrics. The comment actually infers "of consent" from the lyrics where there is actually little to no suggestion that this has anything to do with consent and more to do with the empowerment of women.
While to some the lyrics seem gross and the music video even worse, I'd just have to say that that is straight up bullshit. You want demeaning and gross? It's been happening for years across multiple genres of music (Smack That by Akon ft Eminem, Up All Night by Hinder, Something in Your Mouth by Nickelback, I Get Off by Halestorm, S&M by Rihanna, etc.).
The song Blurred Lines has nothing to do with rape and the fact that western feminists are pushing this (so much so that Thicke has canceled concerts) only goes to show the ignorance of the group and how little attention is paid to actual problems across the world (and here at home) such as the sex trade, girls in the Middle East being shot for going to school, etc.
4. Mothers who blame girls for posting sexy selfies and leading their sons into sin, instead of talking with their sons about their responsibility for their own sexual expression.
I was okay with the first link that literally said it was an "Everyday Feminism" site. I could handle that and give them the benefit of the doubt that maybe, possibly, they did unbiased, accurate research to get more than one example for each of these 25 examples.
Then it linked me to Jezebel. And I can't even begin to describe how much I wanted to claw my eyes out as I read the post concerning one (you read that right, one) mother who posted an article about how girls should refrain from posting revealing selfies online. Jezebel, as is the custom there, decided to infer that this mother never talked to her boys about sex or responsibility with no real proof.
6. Supporting athletes who are charged with rape and calling their victims career-destroyers.
Steubenville, am I right? I was right.
Nowhere, absolutely nowhere, in this article does anyone support what the boys did. However, if these boys were convicted of murder, theft, arson, animal cruelty or grand theft auto we would be focusing on how they are still young kids who made an absolutely horrid decision that cost them their future but because it was rape the stigma is even worse for these kids. Because of one night's decision these boys will go through early adulthood incarcerated and will come out as registered sex offenders. The crime is horrible, despicable, inhumane, and horrendous. The rapists were kids who chose to make the biggest mistake of their entire lives, committed a crime and completely ruined any shot they had at continuing a career as football players.
Once again, nowhere does anyone in the article say that the victim is a career destroyer. This is most likely taken from the Twitter uproar that surrounded this entire event that saw many people blaming many different things and people for what had happened. Many blamed the parents of each of the teenagers involved, some blamed the girl, some blamed the kid who videotaped it, some blamed the alcohol, but most blamed the boys who actively participated in this horrid atrocity.
There's a difference between feeling sorry for the kids who ruined their entire lives in one night, that's called empathy, and supporting what they actually did. I understand not everyone will ever be able to feel sorry for these boys and I'm not asking you to. All I'm asking is that you don't assume people are supporting the act when they are simply supporting two boys who ruined their own lives.
9. Journalists who substitute the word “sex” for “rape” – as if they're the same thing.
The journalist who wrote this did not substitute words. They said exactly what they were supposed to say. In the United States of America, no one is guilty of a crime until they have been proven guilty. As rape is an extremely serious allegation, journalists tend to stay away from headlines that involve "rape" unless there have been proven cases of a crime. In this case, if you didn't read the article, the word sex is used to describe intercourse that had not been determined to be consensual or not. This is the correct use of the word.
12. The ubiquity of street harassment – and how victims are told that they’re “overreacting” when they call it out.
No source is given for this information so I'll assume that this is just a general idea that you had. Now, I'm no fan of cat calling, nor do I know any decent human beings that participate in it, in fact I know no one who has ever participated in it, but, since I don't live under a rock, I know it happens. However, just as I would say to the "Ban Bossy" campaign or anyone who decides to tell people when they can and cannot say something, I'd like to direct your attention to the Bill of Rights and the First Amendment to the Constitution. This amendment protects freedom of speech with few restrictions placed upon it (you can't yell "FIRE!" in a movie theater). You may believe I am defending this act by saying people should be allowed to have their freedom of speech. However, I'm also of the belief that people have a right to common decency and that there is no actual reason for douchebags to be catcalling as they drive by.
If you wouldn't say it face to face with her, why does your upgraded Maserati give you permission to do it? Honestly it's a cowardly thing to do.
14. Rape jokes – and people who defend them.
First off, the page links to one douchebag who takes it too far, not very convincing of an entire culture. But I do agree that this guy's "joke" is despicable. Anyway, do you understand the psychology of jokes? Obviously not. People joke about things to lighten the mood. It's how jokes work. However, when it comes to rape jokes it's sometimes even deeper than that.
Victims of rape are expected to continue on in their life, especially if they never report it happened to them. This can create many different attitudes towards life and, much like soldiers who have seen brutal combat, sometimes their mind twists things to add a sick side of humor to their otherwise traumatic ordeal. So, don't go believing that every person out there is attempting to expand this supposed "culture" that supports rape. Some are just trying to get through their life.
15. Sexual assault prevention education programs that focus on women being told to take measures to prevent rape instead of men being told not to rape.
Do you understand how asinine of a statement this is? Sexual assault PREVENTION programs decide to teach women ways to PREVENT rape, how dare they!? It's like they are doing exactly what they are supposed to be doing. Rape is not a male v female thing. I am appalled that you would even suggest such a blatantly ignorant viewpoint. The fact that you seem to believe that rape is a singularly male-offender crime is no surprise, but is completely 100% false.
Also, how many courses do we have that teach people to not steal or to not murder or to not become some sort of criminal? Because last I checked we don't normally teach people not to do these things, it's a part of growing up in a modern-day society that people know not to do these things.
Finally, how many male focused sexual assault prevention courses are there in the States? I did some research and I can't find a single male-focused course while there are many women-only courses. In fact, when I looked at articles related to this issue, more prevalent than courses that pertain to tips to prevent rape for men, the articles discuss how men can stop themselves from raping someone or how their default setting is one of violence and therefore they need to be careful not to go off on someone else.
22. Only 3% of rapists ever serving a day in jail.
Here we might find some common ground. Now this is slightly misleading simply because it seems to say that 97% of rapists go through the justice system and walk free. This is far from the truth. If we go with the number of reported rapes (generally 46% of all rapes) the number rises to 12.5% of all reported rapists spend time in jail. If we go to the number of arrested suspects (12% of all rapes lead to an arrest), 25% of all suspected rapists spend time in jail.
Now, before I get you believing that I am trying to construe the horrible statistics here I just want to make it clear that I am simply providing my readers with more information and less misleading statistics.
Back to the common ground. I am a huge proponent of individual rights, as can be seen from many of my postings on here. However, I am also a -less vocal- advocate for a tougher stance on crime and a faster judicial process. This would raise the number of solved crimes while also raising the number of innocents facing jail time. That puts us at an impasse. Do we want to feel safer looking at the number of cases closed or do we want to feel safer knowing there is less of a chance (with the way the system is set up now) that we will be convicted of a crime we didn't commit?
I leave that to my readers and you to contemplate, just know that there is a tradeoff no matter what.
23. Women feeling less safe walking the streets at night than men do.
This phenomenon is actually completely baseless when compared to actual crime rates. I'm not a psychologist, nor do I play one on TV, so I won't try to explain why men and women feel safe when they do.
I can, however, suggest that men feel safer simply because we have an invincibility complex about us. We believe, wrongly, that we can handle any thug that wants to rob, kidnap, rape or murder us and thus have no real problem walking around at night.
Phew, that was a lot at once, wasn't it? Enough education for a little while?
Let's take a break.
Back already? Well then I guess it's time for me to go ahead and make my own point.
If, as you suggest, we do live in this "Rape Culture" (which was never actively explained but that's okay, I get it) then we have to ask ourselves where it comes from. What perpetuates such a desire to rob someone of their complete privacy and right to self? What causes people to go down such a heinous path as rape (arguably worse than murder)?
And here we wind up back at the original portion of the article that started this chain: sex culture. Just as I said in the first article, the sex culture that we live in, in which EVERYTHING is sexualized, is despicable. What really starts a culture of rape? The acceptance and perpetuation of sex in everything from sports to music to advertising to food to animals to each other. We live in a culture that has removed sex from the bedroom and thrown it haphazardly into every crevice of society.
Am I naive enough to believe that rape had not been around before the prevalence of this sex culture? No, nor am I of the belief that rape will suddenly disappear when this culture of sex has diminished. Rape is around because humans are around. It's a sad fact of life that we will most likely never fully eradicate. That does not mean we live in a culture that perpetuates, accepts, or agrees with rape. That's why it is a crime that many believe could be punishable by death and others believe should mean life in prison.
No comments:
Post a Comment