As a Catholic, I was raised to believe in many things; the Trinity, Jesus Christ, the Virgin Mary, the hierarchy of the Church, respect for the pope, etc. Although each of these were important to me as a growing Catholic, one of the biggest fundamentals that I learned growing up in a devout Catholic family and over 13 and a half years of Catholic education is the preciousness of love, and therefor sex. This teaching was fundamental to my life for 17 and a half years until I first had sex which started a real downward spiral in my life. That's not the point of this post though, this isn't some personal internet diary for the world to see. I only wanted that out in the open for two reasons. First, to show my that I can be an idiot, ignorant and make mistakes (I know, it's hard to believe). Second, as a point of reference. I know what I am talking about and, seeing as this post will be from my point of view, it only makes sense to share my POV with y'all.
Anyway, back story diatribe in the back of your mind, there has been an extreme attack on traditional values over the last decade. We have been bombarded with violence, sex, curses, substance abuse, cruelty and disregard for others like never before. Violence is portrayed nightly on our news reports while almost every movie has some subplot of sex and strong language. Hundreds of video games have become successful because of their portrayal of violence and cruelty where you are rewarded for shooting or knifing other players in Call of Duty and Halo. Game of Thrones and House of Cards, two incredibly successful series, portray a life of almost constant bloodshed, cruelty, harsh words, lust and/or indecency towards others in the hope of greater personal gain. It is almost impossible to not have been exposed to this degradation of humanity and yet society is becoming (slightly) numb to it.
I've been known to enjoy the thrill of a CoD killstreak or a Halo headshot, so, no I'm not here to preach about the evil of video games. (And as a side note to those out there who do preach against video games; maybe look further than the game seeing as it is only a symptom of the real problem) Television, internet, books and video games feature something abnormal, that's why people enjoy them. Honestly, how many people would want to read a book or watch a show about a normal person getting an office job at a mediocre firm and living a normal life with normal stressors but nothing supernatural, comical, or out of the ordinary happening? Even our "reality" shows are scripted so they can actually be something that the average person would want to watch. We can forgive the media for these breaches of humanity when we realize that they are there as an escape from reality.
What should not be forgiven is the real life degradation of society, and, ultimately, human life. We may see war every day on XBox, but in the United States, we are extremely lucky to have only a small percentage of our men and women exposed to such devastation. We know "sex sells" better than most countries and we see some part of it almost everywhere we turn. We judge underage binge drinking to be a "mistake" more than a problem. We are more worried about getting kids off of drug possession charges than we are about their mental state. Dropping the f bomb is so close to being a common occurrence that people are trying to think of a worse curse to use. People will vehemently rage about dog fighting rings but will rarely bring up the horrible conditions of the foster care system in the States. We pass the homeless all the time and have been conditioned to look away rather than talk to them. Abortion decimates the entire world every minute of every day and yet we are still calling it a woman's choice.
The degradation of human life has diverse symptoms in our world today; the ones I listed above are only the tip of the iceberg. However, as I did specify above, abortion is, in my eyes, the ultimate act of degrading. Not only is it a legalized form of murder, but it is a form of murder against the most innocent of all. A human life that has done nothing wrong, has not had the chance to sin and does not even have a name yet is ended. Just as the reason for murder does not matter, neither does the reason behind abortion. (And if you would like to bring up the "special pleading" argument of rape and mother's health cases, I'd be happy to dismantle that non-argument in the comments below)
Although the trend of a pro-life society is rising up with many people recognizing the horrors of abortion and abortion clinics in the states, too many people are doing little to nothing to stop this atrocity. This is not specifically the fault of each individual person so much as it is simply the pattern that follows in our misguided society. Sadly, we are living in an extremely passive society that argues that if it doesn't directly affect me, I shouldn't care about it- unless it has something to do with a group of people who have been "historically oppressed."
Hundreds of so-called social justice warriors fight against supposed wrongs done to "minorities" while turning a blind eye to the egregious assault on human life that is abortion. This is just blatantly hypocritical and wrong- no, wrong isn't the right word, it's hypocritical and defective, as much of society has become. From politics to religion to the treatment of celebrities to the blatant disregard for children, our society has become defective and needs to be fixed.
As I hinted at earlier, we are starting to reach the peak of this degradation age. The solution is right in front of us but, because it's not the easy choice and won't magically solve every problem in the book right away, many people are as timid as a chick leaving the nest. Traditional values are changing, there's no questioning that. However, much like the Catholic Church, the oldest living organization in the world, sometimes the best course of action is to reach back and hold onto some sliver of the past. That sliver? The preciousness of children and the innocence therein.
And where do children come from? Yes, Jimmy? "When a mommy and daddy love each other very much they make children!" Well, as we all know that's probably the most simplistic way to put it but there's this act called sex that is really the start of that whole amazing process and we, as a defective society, have taken sex and attempted to remove responsibility, procreation and love from the mix.
Sex is no longer a connection between committed lovers, it is a right of passage. It is the main focus of many short relationships and the outcome of many Friday night parties. The pressure to lose your "V-card" before your 18th birthday is beyond unreasonable. Speaking from experience as a teenager who felt that very pressure, it ruins sex. It becomes a primal activity between two separate entities. Sure the act is fun but it is not what I was raised to believe sex was supposed to be.
Now, I know what I just said isn't popular- I probably wouldn't be writing about it if it was- and that people enjoy sex too much and just want to be able to do what they want no consequences. I know that. But, as my parents taught me and your parents should have taught you, life is hard, life won't give you everything you want, you have responsibilities and there are consequences for your actions. And when it comes to sex there are two main responsibilities that come into play and very serious consequences to that action (notice that consequences, although the word has a negative connotation, are not all bad and in this case some of them are pretty damn amazing).
The first responsibility that you have when having sex is to make sure you are making love instead of sleeping around. Here's a little factoid for all of you groaning out there: each time you have sex, a love drug (okay, it's called oxytocin but whatever) is released which bonds you to your partner. It's meant to strengthen a healthy, genuine, loving relationship. Some people might go ahead and take this as a form of slut shaming but if you want to tell me that I'm a slut-shamer then just be sure to realize that biology and chemistry are slut shaming first.
The second responsibility of sex is recognizing that there is some potential, no matter how much birth control you use or what kind of condom you buy, that a baby is going to be formed. Which is freaking awesome (and if you don't think so you must not like chocolate, puppies, Lion King or happiness...). So you want a choice to not have a kid? Good! just don't have sex. You aren't ready for a baby? Completely fine, skip the coitious and go to post-coitious cuddling (I promise it's pretty awesome). You can't handle being a mother/ father? Understandable, don't do the do.
I know I'm going to get flak from parents, Christians, religion teachers and friends for what I'm about to say but I'm going to go ahead and say it. I'm not here to preach an abstinent society. You don't have to wait until marriage to have sex. All I'm asking is that you recognize the responsibility that goes into sex. Know the consequences, accept the responsibility and make sure you and your partner are on the same wave length when it comes to having sex. (Oh and if you even think your partner does want to wait do not be a manipulative asshole and push them into it, they'll only hate you for it later on
Insightful and responsible article, very well put for a young man!
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